Is anyone else besides me so scared of the dentist that the anticipation of knowing the appointment is coming sends you right into the bathroom because of the nerves? I ask my mom, “WHY AM I LIKE THIS?” She says it’s genetic but I don’t know about that, I think she is just making me feel like I’m not alone.
I went to a new dentist because of insurance on Friday. I have been going to the same dentist for 16 years now. I trust him and they have always made me to believe I was doing my job at home. I’ve had two cavities in my life and two wisdom teeth pulled. Each time? I get nauseated and have to stop on side of the road to get sick after the appointment out of nerves getting the best of me. I remember when my 1st baby had a cavity, I sent him in to the dentist while I went and sat on the toilet the whole appointment. Out of being so scared of what he was going to have to endure at four years old. He came out of there smilin’ and had a blast! I floss and brush twice a day, yes, flossing every day, out of, RIGHT OUT FEAR of what could happen if I DON’T!
So, I go in on Friday and I left there feeling like I have not taken good care of my teeth because when I had gone into my dentist 6 months ago all was good and now they need a major overhaul. The two cavities? Needed replacing, I have a sensative spot that needed ‘covered over’ and while we are at it let’s numb your whole mouth and give you a deep cleaning!!! I called my girl friend that is a dental assistant and shed many tears telling her what happened.
So, today was the day, I woke up crying, I went in crying, I am such a BABY! They did not know what to do with me. I’m a tough girl during the proceedure and really it isn’t that bad once I’m into it, it’s the before, I FREAK!
I sat there in that chair and my tongue got numb and felt like it was taking all the space in my mouth, I felt my lips were as big as the room, at one point I started to panic (when they left me for a few minutes to let the numbing stuff really take affect and as I sat there I started having an anxiety attack thinking my throat was numb, I couldn’t swallow, I was going to DIE!! I was laying down and shot straight up, and trying to talk myself down, “you are ok, you are ok, breath, breath!, ok, I’m ok, I am ok” The doctor comes in, “are you ok?” Can’t talk I have a numb tongue, “ugh huh” (hold back the tears, hold them back!!!) Pretty uneventful after that, feel pretty sick on the way home, and now I sit here and am still numb but I’m alive.
I woke up this morning telling myself to be a big girl, be BRAVE, YOU CAN DO IT! Blah on all of that self talk!!!
WIll I EVER learn that the dentist is not the one going to send me straight to the pearly gates?