I was talking to a girl friend a couple of days ago and we had this conversation. She, in all of her beauty was telling me she has the hardest times going to these ‘girl’s night outs’ at church or a bible study because they all seem so clickie and it is so uncomfortable to go and not think that you are the only one who may not know anyone and no one is friendly and it was so frustrating!
As I was listening to her I knew exactly what she was talking about. There is nothing like walking into room and just wanting to shrink right out of sight. I told her a little story though, in hopes that it would encourage her. I prefaced it with the fact that if I told my family I did or do this they would laugh because it just isn’t me at all. I am really a more of a one on one kind of girl and do get so intimidated in a group setting. I hate being in front of people, most of the time when I am I feel the ugly cry wanting to break it’s ugly self right onto my face no matter what! It drives me crazy! So, it does not come natural for me AT ALL!
Our last ‘girl’s night out’ where all of these ladies come together and there are tables throughout the sanctuary and you come in and find a seat at one of these tables with these other 8 or so women. I got to the function a little late so most all were seated and lots of girl chattering going on. I looked in the sanctuary and wanted to scoot my hinnie right out the door, get in my car, stop and get me some french fries with ice tea and call it a night at HOME in all my safety of not feeling uncomfortable around a bunch of chattie women!
My friend whom I was speaking with, not in a million years would you ever think that she might be feeling shy or out of place. She is beautiful and if people weren’t opening themselves up to her it was because THEY were intimidated by her.
This is when I have learned to turn on the Miss Congeniality, step out of all my insecurity and press on! So, I put my head up high, walk to a table that I knew NO ONE AT and sat myself down. I got a few, kind of, smiles and sat there for a few minutes and realized none of these women knew each other. There was an older lady that invited her young neighbor but you could tell they were even uncomfortable. I wasn’t having it. A whole night like this might just KILL me so I just put myself out there and started asking questions. Do you go to church here? How long? Oh, and you are from so and so? Ohhhhh!!!! Tell me about your kids, how many? Vacation? You lucky girl! You have beautiful eyes!……. And they began to open up and in that time I started digging and found some of these women who shared some things that were AMAZING and how AMAZING our Lord was thru them. We ALL seemed to really enjoy ourselves after that. After that I felt so BLESSED!
Years ago, 20, as a matter of fact, I went to a women’s retreat not knowing a soul and even roomed with a gal who I did not know or had ever seen and now to this day I would consider her one of my most very precious friends. SCARY! But, I have a life long friend out of it.
I think my Mom taught this to me in a way. She MADE me become a cheerleader, cuz I hated being in front of people, she suggested I become a flight attendant, RELUCTANTLY and with not a lot of hope of being hired, applied and was hired. She ALWAYS pushed me to these awkward so uncomfortable things that were not easy yet these are the things that have shaped me and have been a huge part of my life. I now do this for my son who cried when I made him go to his first football practice, or go to the youth group now that he has his closest friends. It was a struggle and a push but now HE LOVES THESE THINGS in his little world.
So, I say all of this to say, if you are feeling a little insignificant, out of place, or like you are the only one….turn on that Miss Congeniality for just a moment and soon you will find that you were not the ONLY one and you may loose out on some great blessings in your life if you don’t.